Visit msnbc.com for breaking news, world news, and news about the economy

I’m off to buy this book right now. I will definitely have something to say about this. I’d like to say it’s all bullshit but I really want to read what she has to say first.

There has been a lot of response to my previous post about Mixed Orientation Marriages. Overwhelmingly people suggested that societal views kept the gay spouse in the closet even encouraging them to seek out marriage with their straight spouse. That somehow getting married would “cure” them.

I’m sure this is the case for a lot of people and certainly was more common a generation ago but does anyone really believe, today, that a gay person can be “cured”? Obviously a lot of religions promote the whole ex gay experience but I can’t imagine that there are really that many believers.

One commenter said that he had discussed this with several straight spouses and learned that the gay spouse had indeed shared his or her feelings with a professional or clergy. Is it not the clergy’s responsibility to prevent this marriage from happening knowing that one partner can’t give of himself completely to the marriage? This strikes me as extremely irresponsible on the clergy’s part.

I also agree with the comment that this probably less in large cities like San Francisco or New York, that in the smaller cities and towns it is still as common as it ever was. I’m not so sure about that but I’m sure it is a lot easier to be out and proud in New York and not so easy in Boise.

It still doesn’t make it right. I wonder how many of the gay spouses had a sick feeling on their wedding day? If they knew that what they were doing was not only a lie to their intended but to themselves as well.

I wonder what it will take for gay men and women from smaller towns to feel that they don’t have to get married and act straight? Are we even close yet? Do the marriage laws have to change nation wide to allow gay marriage? Will that prevent these MOMs from taking place? Do we need more openly gay people in the media? Do we start outing people?