I have been meaning to update this blog for a long time, I have been so busy with my other blogs I just haven’t had time to write a decent post here, I am sorry but I am not abandoning this blog.
I was going to post today about another child of a mixed orientation marriage who I recently met. You can read Erin’s story here. I was going to give a much bigger intro but then I saw that the judge overturned the ban on gay marriage in CA and wanted to comment very quickly on that.
This decision will be appealed for sure but this is a big step in the right direction. This is what Judge Vaughn Walker had to say about his decision:
“Moral disapproval alone is an improper basis on which to deny rights to gay men and lesbians. The evidence shows conclusively that Proposition 8 enacts, without reason, a private moral view that same-sex couples are inferior to opposite-sex couples,” Walker went on to say, “Proposition 8 fails to advance any rational basis in singling out gay men and lesbians for denial of a marriage license.”
You can read about this landmark decision here on CNN.
Is Elena Kagan gay or not? That is the question everyone is asking everyone else but Ms. Kagan.
My knee jerk response to the question of her sexuality is that it isn’t anyone’s business. However on further and deeper consideration it occurs to me that it is our business if she is gay.
Ms Kagan has accepted a nomination to the highest court in our country, she will be making decisions of the utmost importance which will affect all Americans. It is safe to say that in the next decade the Supreme Court will be asked to make some decisions regarding homosexuals.
I’m against outing anyone who doesn’t want to be outed. However, Ms Kagan has become a public figure by accepting the nomination. As someone who may hold considerable power it is her obligation to be forthcoming with the answer to this question.
The assumption seems to be that indeed she is a lesbian. If that is true, and not that there is anything wrong with it, then why isn’t she saying so? Is she ashamed of her sexuality? If she is gay and remains in the closet will she vote against gay rights?
She wouldn’t be the first.
Roy Ashburn, Republican senator who recently announced he was gay because he got busted, has voted against every gay rights bill put before him. And he only made number 5 on the top ten list of anti-gay gays.
The right might want to take Ms Kagan’s sexuality and make it an issue but the left has an obligation to ask this question so that she doesn’t use the court to hide her sexuality.
I hope she is gay, I hope she stands up and announces to the world “Yes, I am” like so many courageous men and women leading everyday lives.
It takes courage to come out of the closet. There will be a shit storm if she states that she is gay, no doubt about that. But if she refuses to answer the question and she is gay she is doing a horrible disservice to gay rights and to young men and women everywhere who struggle with their own sexuality.
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Couples waited in line to apply for their marriage license today outside the DC courthouse. Not a big deal usually except these couples were same sex couples.
No one was married today, there is a three day waiting period, but next week there will be an awful lot of newlyweds.
The day of celebration was not without disruption. Fred Phelps‘ Westboro Baptist Church was there to protest, name call, and be generally offensive. Fred Phelps and his minions are the people who protest at funerals for service men and women, they hate jews, they hate fags. They run around holding signs that say “God Hates Fagsthey are basically the scum in my opinion.
That’s them holding their “God Hates Fags” sign and this picture was taken at a protest last year. Sorry I can’t remember which one it was, nor who took the picture. I had permission last year but don’t know how long that is good for. If you took this picture and want credit please leave a comment and I will update.
Pennies in Protest Raises Money for Local Jewish and LGBT Organizations
Richmond, VA (February 26, 2010) In response to the upcoming protests by the Westboro Baptist Church in Richmond, Virginia, a local group called Pennies in Protest is calling all Richmonders to donate money to the targets of the anti-gay and anti-Jew protests.
Westboro Baptist Church (WBC), based in Topeka, Kansas, is an anti-gay church known for picketing funerals of AIDS victims, stomping on American flags, and protesting gay and Jewish organizations around the country.
On its website, WBC has announced its plans to protest at four locations in Richmond: The Virginia Holocaust Museum, the University of Richmond Hillel organization at the Jewish Community Center, the Jerusalem Connection, and Hermitage High School because the school allowed the creation of a gay student group.
A local group called Pennies In Protest has started collecting money for every minute that WBC is protesting Richmond organizations. Founded by Richmonders Patience Salgado (aka www.kindnessgirl.com), Jessica Lucia, Sara Heifetz, and Sarah Allen-Short, the group hopes to turn the WBC protests into something beneficial for the targets of the hate attacks. The Richmond group got the idea from a synagogue in Manhattan that raised more than $10,000 for charity during a recent visit from WBC.
You can read more about Pennies in Protest on the website. You do not have to be from Virginia to support this cause. You can donate on the site for as little as 1 cent a minute, you just have to do the math.
This is an incredibly worthy cause and I encourage all of you to stop by and have a look. As you know I have all kinds of issues with Westboro Baptist Church. I can hardly contain my contempt for the lower than life forms that make up the membership.
I run this kind of post every now and again to remind people with gay parents that they are not the only ones. When I was a kid I was sure I was the only child, not including my brother, who had a gay parent.
There were no television show about mixed orientation marriages or gays with children. As far as I knew gays couldn’t have kids, because they couldn’t get married. I was a little naive.
Growing up watching shows like The Brady Bunch, which set the standard for well adjusted families, it would have been nice if Robert Reed had been out or if I had known he was closeted. Of course if a 10 year old girl from Minnesota knew Robert Reed was gay it’s a sure bet everyone else would have too.
Of course we all know Melissa Etheridge is gay and a parent. She has had two highly publicized partnerships and when it was revealed who the sperm donor was of her children it got plenty of press.
Judy Garland’s father was gay though I never knew that until I was much older.
Today celebrities who are gay and have children aren’t big news. Which is as it should be. But it is nice to know there are many gay parents out there, celebrity or not, who are raising healthy and happy kids
Last night I went to an event in Minneapolis. It was a meet and greet kind of thing for Crave Minneapolis, a chance to meet business women. I met some really interesting women there and am so glad I braved the storm and drove for hours (what would usually take 20 minutes) to go to this event.
I handed out my business card to one of the women I was speaking with. She noticed this blog listed on the back of the card and asked if I was a kid of queers. I said that indeed I was. She then went on to say that some of the most interesting people she knew had been raised by gay parents.
She meant two gay parents who were out of the closet living their life openly and honestly.
I explained that I was not that kind of child, that I had been raised by one straight parent and one gay, closeted parent.
The venue was loud so there wasn’t much discussion on the subject after that. We got to talking about the movie Mighty Ducks since her business was named for the character she played in the movie. She named her business Cake Eater Bakery and if you are ever in the Minneapolis/St. Paul area you must find one of their stores and try their sweets. I sampled one of their brownies (they called them something else but I can’t remember the name) and they were to die for. Better than sex brownies.
But I have gotten off track.
Her comment made me think about a couple of things on my long drive home.
As a child raised by a gay parent I don’t fit the mold. It wasn’t something I spoke about to anyone when I was growing up. I didn’t because I didn’t think I was allowed to. No one ever told me not to say anything but somewhere along the way I learned it was something for which I should be ashamed.
Kids today, who are raised by gay parents, have it so differently than kids in my generation or at least circumstance. They don’t worry about what other kids are going to say. Not that other kids won’t say something but since they aren’t hiding anything they don’t have to grow up trying to keep a secret.
I did.
I kept my dad’s secret just like he kept his secret when he was growing up. I don’t think he meant to drag me, or the rest of my family, into the closet but I don’t think he thought he had any other options.
None of this is here nor there.
I find it interesting that as it becomes hip to be gay or raised gay {(I mean hip as in accepted more and more) I never use the word hip, I usually use the word cool but I use it too often so I’m trying something else, I’m not that old however that I ever used hip in a hip way}. Anyway, my point, and I really do have one, is that I still don’t really fit the mold.
I know there are a lot of people who read this blog but who never comment. If you are a child of a gay parent, or parents please let me know you are here by saying “hi”. You don’t have to use your real name. I just want to know that there are others out there like me.
When I started to write this post I had something completely different in mind, thus my title.
I struggle to find topics to write about on this blog. Especially because there is little feedback I don’t know if anyone is interesting in what I am saying. I don’t want to just feature news stories about LGBT issues, nor do I want to talk about religion all the time. If you have a suggestion for a topic, if you have a question you would like answered I would be happy to write on those topics and welcome any idea you might have. Please help me out by leaving a comment with any topic you would like for me to discuss.
I’ve never done this before on this blog but we are going to try something new.
Becky, the skin goddess from StormSister Spatique, has an awesome treat she wants to share with all of the readers on Kids of Queers.
INtelligent Nutrients lip balm is the balm to use this winter. Kick the Carmex habit by using a formula that isn’t made out of tires or other petroleum byproducts. Becky gave me two of these to giveaway.
I’ve been using this very lip balm for a couple of months now and it is wonderful. It’s got all sorts of good stuff in it that is all natural and organic which include some anti-aging stuff so it actually makes your lips look younger. You can read all about here.
I’ve never done a real giveaway here but I have seen them done and I am just going to follow suit.
Here’s what ya gotta do.
Sign up for the Kids of Queers newsletter, the box is just up there in the right hand side of the sidebar.
That’s it. The contest will run through the 12th of this month so you have a full week to sign up. Don’t worry, I won’t spam you. I send out a newsletter once a week to recap the events going on here and to pass out a little linky love.
Winners will be chosen from random using that random thingy online.
(yes, I still have to find it)
If you want some extra entries then you can do any or all of the following, however you must subscribe to the newsletter for the extra entries to count.
Last night I flipped on Larry King and saw him interviewing Dominic Friesen, the spokesman for Man Crunch.com. Apparently this ad had been rejected by CBS to run during the Super Bowl.
There were a couple of other guests who were weighing in with their opinion about the rejection. I can’t remember their names. There was the sitting-on-the-fence guy who thought showing the ad was just a slippery slope and the Republican who thought the ad was wrong.
Full disclosure here, I am a Republican. I believe the government should stay out of our lives as much as possible and that they should be fiscally conservative. On social issues such as this however I completely disagree. I also recycle and drink green tea.
The argument for rejecting the ad went something like this:
No one wants to have to explain to their kids why two men are kissing. That’s a discussion for another time, not during football. However discussing abortion during the Super Bowl is perfectly acceptable.
Man Crunch was accused never having the funding in place to actually air the ad. Everyone agreed it was a great PR stunt, to get rejected by CBS and the Super Bowl. At one point one of the commentators asked if Man Crunch really thought the Super Bowl was the best way to spend that kind of money. The target audience was hardly a bunch of gay men looking for love.
I completely disagree with that assertion and Dominic Friesen should have too. Many gays love Football, as do lesbians. But even more gays love the commercials during the Super Bowl. My father never watched football, he much preferred to listen to the opera but when the Super Bowl aired he was all about watching the ads, just like everyone else. Some of the best Super Bowl parties I have been to have been hosted by gays. In fact, does anyone really watch the game? Having a Man Crunch ad air during the Super Bowl would be a great ROI. To suggest less is offensive.
As for my kids watching two men kiss on TV and the discussion that would supposedly follow? First, I don’t think they’d even notice it but if they did I’d be happy to0 talk to them, again, about two men kissing. I’d much rather they watch two football fans making out then Paris Hilton have her hamburger orgasm.
And I certainly don’t want to discuss abortion with them during the game, but now it looks like we will be doing just that.
And what of the kids who are sitting and watching the game with their two dads or two moms? Wouldn’t a commercial like the Man Crunch one just normalize their life a little more? As in their lifestyle is not longer a “lifestyle” but just like everyone else?
I’d like to see the commercial aired.
As for CBS, it’s their network, they can air any commercial they see fit. And if gays choose not to watch CBS that’s okay too.
What do you think? Is it okay to air these kinds of commercials. Do you want to see two men kissing or would you rather get a 30 second spot about the horrors of abortion?
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